I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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