Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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