How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Hippo gnu deer
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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