I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
