I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
