And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
