And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
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