____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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