There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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