A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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