So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
