Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
