Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Randomize
