when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
