Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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