it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize