I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
