Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Randomize
