I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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