haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
