she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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