It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
