so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Never underestimate the power of titties
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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