I think my vagina is haunted
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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