How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Randomize
