I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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