What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
