we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
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