i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
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He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
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WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
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