Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
