can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize