You can't motorboat a personality
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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