she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
