thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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