If i come over, it means nothing
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
