The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
