fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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