lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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