so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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