so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
