oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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