The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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