Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
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New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
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I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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