I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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