You made me cry and you don't even care
I understand Curling. That high.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
