Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
