remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Randomize
