I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
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