I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
