Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
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